As a child, I used to think to be the best was about being super focused and making no mistakes; to win, to be better than someone else, to be perfect and flawless.

Like all children, I wanted my parent’s attention, approval and ultimately their love more than anything else. Growing up in a traditional Chinese household, there was a great deal of emphasis placed on academic achievements.

However, when we first immigrated to Canada, I was immediately thrown into grade 3 with no command of the English language beyond simple words like - yes, no, thank you, hello, banana, and trick-or-treat (Halloween was my first night in Canada). I was also extremely shy as a child, in a foreign country with no friends, so it took me nearly two years to learn to communicate with my peers and teachers effectively.

Obviously, my grades suffered and this caused a great deal of distress for me as I could sense my parent’s disappointment and concern. So I attempted to make up the difference by being as athletic as I could on the field of sport - and to my own surprise, I was able to communicate with my peers through playful activities even though I couldn’t string a coherent English sentence together.

In playing, I learned to make new friends and my new Canadian friends learned how to communicate with me through simple broken English. Through trusting friendships, I grew in confidence to try new words and eventually learned how to converse more fluently in English. Reading and writing was a whole other challenge that took me until grade 6 to feel comfortable and proficient in.

Why am I sharing all of this with you? It’s because this lesson in playful learning was lost to me for most of my adult life, and it wasn’t until I started practicing Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu in 2008 and hearing Ryron Gracie talk about ‘keeping it playful’ that I was reminded of the power of playfulness in learning new things.

This is why children excel at learning, and why as adults we struggle. The degree to which we feel safe enough to relax, explore, experiment, make mistakes, learn from them, and integrate those discoveries are what lead to growth and skill acquisition.

The more fun we experience, the more engaging the activity, and the easier it is for us to continue learning even if we make mistakes.

Children are masters at this because they approach everything through the lens of curiosity and fun. It’s why their learning potential is so high and why parents are always amazed at the rate of growth displayed by their children - physically, mentally and emotionally.

This starts to taper off as humans near adulthood, and one of the main roadblocks to adult learning and skill acquisition is the desire for perfection.

In wanting to be perfect, to be the best, to win - this perceived pressure can create an environment where mistakes are not easily tolerated, where praise and validation are only awarded to those who produce tangible results.

In these types of situations, experimentation and playfulness are not widely acceptable norms - just think about the nature of most adult working environments and the jobs we all have, and I think it would be fair to say we don’t often encounter bosses who encourage playful experimentation with precious company resources. These days, everything is measured, everything is tracked, it is a precise science, it’s all mathematics.

I’ve learned from direct experience that is a short-sighted approach to skill acquisition, both in the training room and in the boardroom. Keeping it playful is the secret sauce to learning, growing and becoming your best.

By being playful, we give ourselves the permission to be creative in solving problems - we become more open-minded to exploring non-traditional ‘out of the box’ ideas, non-linear thinking is encouraged, pattern recognition increases, collaboration is amplified, curiosity and inquisitiveness do the driving; and the excitement of new discoveries fuels the mind and inspires the soul.

To be our best requires growth. We cannot grow if we do not learn, and we cannot learn if we’re not encouraged to try new things. So to help you try something new and fun, we want to gift everyone with a 10-day FREE trial to our school, whether you’re new to Jiu-Jitsu or if you’ve been practicing for a while.

All new students to Tri-Cities Gracie Jiu-Jitsu are welcome to come play with us and experience why we’re an officially Certified Training Centre (CTC) of Gracie University, first hand.

Whatever it is, be it your new Jiu-Jitsu hobby with us, your professional work, or your personal life - playfulness is an active key ingredient in developing a sustained growth mindset tailored for learning and creative problem-solving.

We’re here to help, so If you have any questions, just let us know in the comments below, or directly via email to info@tricitiesgjj.com.